Facilitation Tips

How should a host/facilitator prepare for On the Table?

Preparing for On the Table is a little different than preparing for a typical conversation. The Host Guide should give you everything you need to host, but if you want to go the extra mile, here are some tips:

• Make sure to read the On the Table Host Guide from the beginning to end.

• Read our FAQ so you can answer any questions about On the Table that might come up.

• Read through the Facilitation Tips below.

• If you want to, learn more about the Comprehensive Plan.

• Consider giving your hosting/facilitation skills a trial run with friends or family. If you are feeling especially ambitious, ask them to make it a challenge for you!

• If you know all the people coming to your table, consider their personalities in advance. Who will be dominant? Who will be shy?

• If you are hosting a public table or don’t know people that will be there, try to think through how you can best prepare yourself for challenging personalities. We have some great tips below.

 How do you “set the table”, or start the conversation?

Setting expectations and rules at the beginning of your conversation is the simplest thing you can do to make the experience positive.

• Start by introducing yourself and saying why the group is here - to share perspectives on how Lexington is growing and changing, and to provide input into the city’s Comprehensive Plan. (You can follow the script in the Host Guide.)

• Let people know how long they will be there, and how the conversation will flow.

  • In general, On the Table conversations take about an hour or so.

  • Remind people that the conversation will start with a brief survey. The survey will be followed by the conversation about the topics in the survey. At the end, everyone will complete one final question.

• Set some ground rules for the conversation. Here are some we recommend:

  • Be kind and respectful - this is a dialogue, not a debate!

  • Hateful or combative language is counterproductive to the conversation.

  • Make sure everyone has an opportunity to speak.

  • If you know a lot about a topic, don’t use technical language or jargon.

  • Speak only for your own experience and perspective - and allow others to speak for theirs.

  • There are likely experiences and perspectives that you can’t relate to, and that’s ok!

What are some verbal facilitation tips?

The best facilitators make people feel welcome in their conversations. Here are some tips to do that:

• Speak slowly, loudly, and clearly.

• Try to avoid complex words or jargon.

• Manage the conversation:

  • If someone is speaking more than others, ask them to give others a chance to share.

  • If someone is speaking less than others, invite them to to speak more by asking them questions like “What do you think about...”

  • If someone answers with a “Yes” or “No” ask them to elaborate.

• Understand the power dynamics at play and build connections between participants:

  • Some people may feel more or less comfortable talking due to a variety of factors, including their personality, expertise level, race, class, age, political affiliation, gender, nationality, or religion. Try to be aware of these dynamics and who may be less represented in the group.

  • Invite others to be respectful of everyone in the group when sharing their opinion and be aware if anyone is taking over the conversation.

  • Look for and emphasize unlikely connections between the points that people make in conversations, this will make people feel heard and will make them more likely to open up. Think: “I head you say this, that sounds really similar to what this person said.”

  • Restate someone’s point in your own words when necessary to show that you understand what they said. Something like: “So what you’re saying is ...”

• Listen to and affirm people and make space for difference:

  • Wherever possible, find something positive and useful in whatever is being offered.

  • When someone has a different opinion than a group, it’s easy for them to become defensive. If you find yourself or others disagreeing with someone at the table, give extra care to their point and invite them to share others.

  • If you find yourself being criticized, resist the instinct to be defensive. Ask others in the group what they think about the criticism before commenting yourself.

  • When participants ask you a question as the facilitator that is relevant to the conversation, ask other participants in the group if they have any responses first.

  • Help to bring out views that are not fully expressed or represented.

  • If the conversation turns hostile, take a quick pause and give everyone a chance to reset.

• Check in:

  • From time to time during the conversation, pause and ask the group how they are feeling about the conversation. This can be a great chance to take a stretch break, refill coffee make a joke, or give quiet participants a chance to speak.

 What are some non-verbal facilitation tips?

• Look around the whole group: avoid looking too much at a specific individual.

• Show you are feeling relaxed but confident by smiling and keeping your hands still. 

• Stand up when you speak,especially at the beginning of a conversation.

• If you stand up don’t pace up and down, or show your back too much or speak when people can’t see you easily. Don’t stand or sit too close to people if it is clear they want more space.

• Use gestures and actions to keep the group lively and focused or to show affection. Clap your hands to get attention or show someone has done the right

How do you manage different personality types while facilitating?

Different people engage with groups in different ways. Some people are dominant while others are shy. Try these tips for dealing with different personality types.

• Dominant personalities:

  • Dominant personalities tend to take over conversations and are confident that their answers are the correct ones.

  • Facilitators should make sure that others have the opportunity to speak.

  • A good way to manage a dominant personality in a group dynamic is to acknowledge that they have a lot of ideas that they are passionate about, but that the purpose of the conversation is to hear from everyone.

  • When doing this, try to avoid making them feel guilty for their personality or views.

• Shy personalities:

  • Shy personalities are sometimes extra uncomfortable sharing their views in a group setting.

  • Facilitators should make sure that the group has the opportunity to hear from those with shy personalities.

  • A good way to manage a shy personality is by inviting them to share their opinion first and providing them extra time to speak.

  • When doing this in a conversation, refer back to the points that the shy personality made to ensure that they know their perspective is being taken seriously.

• Diversionary personalities:

  • Diversionary personalities have a tendency to bring up off-topic ideas and reorient the conversation to the direction they are most interested in.

  • Facilitators should allow diversionary personalities to share their views but ensure the broader conversation stays on track.

  • A good way to manage a diversionary personality is to listen to the views they share and then use them as a way to redirect the conversation back to the original topic.

  • When doing this, make sure not to provide too many opportunities for diversionary personalities to redirect the conversation.